Well I'll be blown, the extent of my incapacitation has reached the big cheeses at Statoil on a north sea oil rig.....“We still have an unstable pressure situation,” Gisle Johanson, a company spokesman, said by phone today".
I also am slightly worried by the wikipedia definition of instability:
'Instability in systems is generally characterized by some of the outputs or internal states growing without bounds.'
Good grief, they are describing what is happening to my mid drift....'growing without bounds' eek! There's also a worrying trend for my brain to suddenly feel like it's going explode...I am wandering if there is a pressure release valve anywhere that can be deployed in case of emergency by those that are my nearest and dearest - you know who you are so make sure you have some idea as to how to achieve the necessary calming effect that comes from releasing the pressure valve!
Let me explain.....21 weeks of no running, 6 weeks of no biking. Let me put it another way 'I NEED TO RUN AND EXPEND ENERGY!!!!!!!!!!'. If only I could bank it for the next Ironman training, if only it worked like that :-). What am I going on about you may think; enjoy the rest, take the time to 'discover' another interest...well I do enjoy other things, cooking, writing, reading, gardening, but let me share what it does for me when I can pull on the runners and escape out the door for an hour:
It's 5am, darkness is still all around, the Brisbane winter air has a bite to it that belies what will be the usual summer heat when only a small bite of freshness to the air is quickly wrapped up by the enveloping heat. I have rolled out of bed, a little sleepy, taking a few minutes to let my body adjust from warm bed to chilly air, for my brain to try to understand that it really is good to get up, that even in the dark there is a beauty of being out and about when everybody else is sleeping. The clothes are pulled on, already prepared the night before so that the grey matter doesn't have too much to contemplate this morning. The runners, so comfortable, so familiar, slip onto my feet. I have a swig of water, tie my hair back, put on a cap and head out the front door.
The legs start to ache as they pound on the pavement, slowly waking up from their slumber. The lungs inhale gulps of cold air burning that burns slightly on its way in. The face is stung by chilly air. The feet and hands are cold. 5 minutes in and the blood is pumping, the mind is alert, the body is starting to respond to the demands I am putting on it. My breathing settles to an easy rhythmn, my legs go onto metronome rhythmn, the hardness of the ground disappears, my mind starts to contemplate the issues of life...that is when I know it is a good run. And that's where the issues of life get sorted, or at least the pressure released. My pressure valve sits somewhere between not wanting to leave a warm bed and the metronomic running pattern 5-10 minutes later. The issues that seemed to be building up dissolve into my sweat. There is a lightness in my mind as I run past dog walkers, watching the sky lighten, hearing the birds wake up. I can get my fix from running alone or with people, it is still an individual thing that people get different things from. I can't imagine every being able to achieve the same feeling from anything else. I'd cope, but the pressure valve would have to develop a slow leak to keep me sane....I think it would take lots of other things put together to even do that.
Running, losing yourself over the course of an hour or so, physically worn but mentally refreshed, the world of Faye seeming easier. Perspective achieved.
Present situation: pressure building, a slow leak not really helping enough.
Lost: one pressure release valve.
Wanted: nearest and dearest please keep looking and let me know when you find an alternative.
Time to go slothing ;-)
F
x
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Back on the Bike?
I have had trouble thinking of something to write for the past 4 weeks and 4 days....my blog is about training right, and I haven't really been doing any; or nothing to speak of. And no, I am not counting days...well OK maybe I am. I have lost count of non-running days so this count only takes into account non-riding days. BUT the counter has stopped today!
It was time to 'get back on the horse' so to speak, and test this knee of mine out. Having rested it completely for 4 weeks and 4 days MUST had been of benefit surely!
Well it wasn't the best return to riding I've ever had. Hang on; I haven't yet had a 'return to riding' as I've never had a lay off riding before. My knee / ITB / troublesome leg was, well a little troublesome. Injury, lack of use, just getting used to working again? Well it gets to the situation where I think, 'well what is going to work'? With several months of no running and over 4 weeks of absolutely no riding, no kicking when swimming, no long walks and no stress (on my leg at least!), what comes next?
I guess I just have to suck it and see. No race entries are being penned (OK only that small one I had to do a month or so ago for NZ Ironman 2011)until I am training pain free, and things will go slowly slowly.
So, where to from now? I had a little think, what could I have written about these past 4 weeks and 4 days? My life has always always involved some kind of high intensity sport - mostly running until the body started telling me it was time to diversify. My esteemed friends have had plenty of suggestions of alternative sports to get stuck into....wait for it.....
- Marbles (No point, I lost mine a while back)
- Lawn bowls (mmmmm let me think for a nano second...NO!)
- Crochet (is that really a sport!)
- Darts (too much opportunity for overuse injury..)
Mmmmm, I am not inspired by any of those. But surely neither 'full on training' nor 'being injured' are the only labels that define me as a person? I hope not. Maybe I should start collecting ideas from those who know me, and start thinking myself about what defines me. Trouble is, I like being someone who trains, who pushes themselves to achieve, who can run, cycle and swim (probably in that order of ability!) with friends, who can be competitive in a friendly way, who can feel smashed but content at the end of a 5 hour ride and 1 hour run, who can wander at the start of a race 'why the hell am I doing this', and feel at the end 'wow I am SO glad I did'. Maybe I need to realise that I am still that person, maybe the frustration I feel is part of what makes me who I am, maybe I need to understand that nothing lasts forever and life continually changes, maybe I need to learn to say 'wow I am SO glad that I am' 'that I have the opportunity to do', 'that I know those I do'.
But maybe just maybe I'm just not quite there yet! I'm sure I will have other things to write about, they may not be as exciting, but it all tells a story.....and hopefully the story that gets me back on the bike, back in my runners, and back enjoying a flat white and fruit toast with friends after smashing ourselves silly pursuing the draw of those feel good hormones....maybe that's why we do what we do. If anyone finds something else that fits the bill in the meantime, let me know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Faye
x
It was time to 'get back on the horse' so to speak, and test this knee of mine out. Having rested it completely for 4 weeks and 4 days MUST had been of benefit surely!
Well it wasn't the best return to riding I've ever had. Hang on; I haven't yet had a 'return to riding' as I've never had a lay off riding before. My knee / ITB / troublesome leg was, well a little troublesome. Injury, lack of use, just getting used to working again? Well it gets to the situation where I think, 'well what is going to work'? With several months of no running and over 4 weeks of absolutely no riding, no kicking when swimming, no long walks and no stress (on my leg at least!), what comes next?
I guess I just have to suck it and see. No race entries are being penned (OK only that small one I had to do a month or so ago for NZ Ironman 2011)until I am training pain free, and things will go slowly slowly.
So, where to from now? I had a little think, what could I have written about these past 4 weeks and 4 days? My life has always always involved some kind of high intensity sport - mostly running until the body started telling me it was time to diversify. My esteemed friends have had plenty of suggestions of alternative sports to get stuck into....wait for it.....
- Marbles (No point, I lost mine a while back)
- Lawn bowls (mmmmm let me think for a nano second...NO!)
- Crochet (is that really a sport!)
- Darts (too much opportunity for overuse injury..)
Mmmmm, I am not inspired by any of those. But surely neither 'full on training' nor 'being injured' are the only labels that define me as a person? I hope not. Maybe I should start collecting ideas from those who know me, and start thinking myself about what defines me. Trouble is, I like being someone who trains, who pushes themselves to achieve, who can run, cycle and swim (probably in that order of ability!) with friends, who can be competitive in a friendly way, who can feel smashed but content at the end of a 5 hour ride and 1 hour run, who can wander at the start of a race 'why the hell am I doing this', and feel at the end 'wow I am SO glad I did'. Maybe I need to realise that I am still that person, maybe the frustration I feel is part of what makes me who I am, maybe I need to understand that nothing lasts forever and life continually changes, maybe I need to learn to say 'wow I am SO glad that I am' 'that I have the opportunity to do', 'that I know those I do'.
But maybe just maybe I'm just not quite there yet! I'm sure I will have other things to write about, they may not be as exciting, but it all tells a story.....and hopefully the story that gets me back on the bike, back in my runners, and back enjoying a flat white and fruit toast with friends after smashing ourselves silly pursuing the draw of those feel good hormones....maybe that's why we do what we do. If anyone finds something else that fits the bill in the meantime, let me know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Faye
x
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